I wasn't expecting much from this, and I wasn't proven wrong. I've never been crazy about Tim Burton, but I found his last outing Alice in Wonderland particularly weak. I also find Johnny Depp plays the same character over and over, but it also looked from the trailer like this might be a bizarre reimagining of the Addams Family. It never manages even that, at least not consistently. Depp's vampire comes out of a 200-year captivity to find the world changed around him, although not as much his contemporary relatives. Cue an opportunity for Burton to play with amusing and ironic contrasts between the 18th century and 1970s, but far too much is instead taken up with the love-story-that-isn't between him and his captor - witch Eva Green.
That element of the story is in play from the ill-advised (and unnecessary) prologue through to the barely intelligible finale, and it's a shame. It's used as the backbone to the film, but is all outdated stereotypes in a film needing nuance and subtlety; it's such a waste of such a talented cast! Depp's vampire is gently amusing, but he's acted off the screen by Michelle Pfeiffer, who knows just what touch to lend proceedings, and Chloe Grace Moretz, who proves Hit Girl wasn't a flash in the pan. When the three are on screen (the women chewing every scene up with relish) genuine sparks fly, but Burton always returns to Green's witchly shenanigans, which although amusing, are a dull and predictable distraction.
Not a single character is given any room to breathe, and by the end you're no clearer about why you're supposed to care about their fates. It denotes a poor script, and it's a shame Burton went with it. It's a film ultimately out of its time, sitting far more comfortably with Pfeiffer's Witches of Eastwick then with the far more advanced Avengers, which, unlike this mess, is a masterclass in blending magic, action, sci-fi and character development. For Burton completists only - this isn't Edward Scissorhands.
